Word on the street is that former A’s killing pitcher, Orel Hershiser, is interested in interviewing for the vacant A’s managerial position. Some have asked "why Orel", and crass puns aside, the answer is simple: He qualifies.

But what does it take to qualify for an interview with the Oakland Athletics? What is General Manager Billy Beane looking for in an applicant?

Notes From The Nat was recently slipped a copy of the official form that Billy Beane requests all applicants fill in before being granted an interview, and apparently Hershiser ranked very highly in all categories, thus he’s in the running.

So without further ado, here it is. 

Oakland Athletics Job Application Qualification Form:

Please mark each box that pertains to your qualifications with a tick. Failure to mark each box rules you ineligible to work for Billy Beane and the Oakland A’s at this time.

[  ] Are you experienced in professional baseball?
[  ] Are you experienced in coaching professional sports?
[  ] Are you prepared to work long hours?
[  ] Are you prepared to relocate to the Bay Area?
[  ] Are you inexpensive?
[  ] No, like REALLY inexpensive?
[  ] Seriously, we’re talking soup kitchen inexpensive here.
[  ] Can I borrow a dollar?
[  ] Will you bark like a dog if I tell you to?
[  ] Go on then. Bark like a dog. A little one. One of those Taco Bell dogs.
[  ] Okay, now a Golden Lab. With a sore throat.
[  ] Not bad. Can you do an impression of Charo?
[  ] I don’t care if you can’t. Do it anyway. Something from a Broadway show, but in Spanish.
[  ] Drop and give me twenty.
[  ] Go get me a sandwich.
[  ] And none of that mayo crap. I’m on a diet.
[  ] Sockpuppetsayswhat?

Fine. You’re signed.